I started reading the book, “#IMOMSOHARD,” by Kristin Hensley & Jen Smedley, and let me tell you most of it was spot on. It’s spunky, raw, and funny, and I’m betting most moms can relate in some way.
While we try to navigate this thing called motherhood, I am always looking for inspiration. I’ve highlighted some of my favorite parts–things that made me laugh, things that made me cry, and things that gave me hope that I am not the only one feeling all these crazy feelings!
The things I am pointing out are split up into two parts. All of these are from separate chapters, so they may not seem to “go together,” but that’s the fun in blogging. I can do what I want. I was just feeling so inspired, I had to get my initial thoughts out there…
I can assure you…The second post will be coming soon!
HERE YOU GO:
Thought #1: “If I wanted to stand out, I had to work 3 times as hard.”
This resonated with me on so many levels. The truth is, anything that I have ever been good at, I had to put in the work for it. I was never ‘naturally’ talented at any one thing. I always joke that I can do a lot of things, “kind-of well.” Was I the most athletic? No–but I love sports and put the time and effort in when it mattered to me. I like to be crafty–but I am not as patient and as good with numbers and measuring like others are. Am I the most “book-smart” person? Absolutely not. But I work hard to learn the best practices for my job in order to be the best I can be for my kids at school. Am I naturally a good mom? No–but you can bet that I work as hard as I can to make sure those kiddos know how much I love them–and that’s what matters!
Take away: If it matters to you, you will find a way.
Thought #2: “The moment you are most attractive is when you feel comfortable.”
So many times we get caught up in how we look–are we wearing the trendiest clothes? Does our hair look like it was freshly washed this morning? I have mentioned this in my previous post, Finding Contentment, that we need to take a step back from staying up to date on all the latest trends. It is exhausting and just not worth it all the time! How many of you have those friends who just look good in everything–no matter their size? Wanna know their secret? They probably have found comfort in their skin just as they are.
Do stylish clothes make you feel comfortable? Make-up? No make-up? Sweats? Hats?
Take away: Whatever makes you “you” is definitely good enough.
Thought #3: “Be okay with average. Be a 7. It is a lucky number.”
At first I laughed at this. But then I thought about it, and these girls are totally right. As a working mom, I am trying like hell to give 100% to my husband, kids, family, friends, work, and any other things that matter in my life. But you guys, it is impossible. We can’t always give 100%. In order to do that, we are sacrificing something else whether it is time or resources. So, I have developed the mindset to be content with being a 7 at most things. And I am telling you it really is a great number! I’m happier and am not constantly degrading myself for not being perfect at everything.
Take away: Do your best with what you have. If you are a working mom, stay at home mom, college student, in a committed relationship, single, or whatever it is, find a balance that makes you happy–and DO NOT worry what others think about it!
Thought Number 4: “I think we all feel the need to say the same thing when we are asked how we’re doing after we have a baby. We all chirp back, “Oh…it’s good…”
First of all, no, it’s not good. I’m going to be completely honest, I really disliked the newborn to the four-month stage. It’s SO tough! Mentally and physically, it’s downright exhausting, and you just don’t feel like yourself, and feel like it will be an eternity until you have some sort of life back. You feel like you will never sleep again. You hardly eat real food because it takes too long to put something in the microwave. You despise your husband because he gets the luxury of going to work. It’s hard to think that it gets easier. But after you are out of that torturous time, you feel empowered like, “Wow! I did that! And there is a such thing as sleep! But girls, don’t feel ashamed if it’s hard. It has been hard for most, and you are certainly not alone. And when you see those people who think they have it all together–they don’t. They are just really good at pretending!!!!
And secondly. People. If you are not a mother but are friends with someone who just had a baby, I’m going to give you some advice that I wish I knew before. Tell them that you are going to help them do something. Whether it is bringing them food, doing their dishes, picking up their living room, bringing over wine…don’t ask. Just do it!
Take away: Your momma friends need it, even if they say, “Oh, no! You don’t have to do that!” It’s really secret code for, “YES… PLEASE!”
This is it for now, but there is so much more to come!
Comment below with what resonated with you, I’d love to hear it!
Hensley, Kristin, and Jen Smedley. #IMOMSOHARD. HarperOne, 2019.
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