In our generation, social media literally surrounds us. In fact, most of us use it as a method of staying in touch with our family and friends–and for that, I am very thankful. But with that, we also find ourselves comparing what we have and what we do to those on social media. We think, “Wow, look at how ‘put’ together she is,” or “She is so good at taking pictures of her kids,” or “look how clean her house is in the background!”
This is what we need to STOP. Right now. We have no idea what is actually going on behind those photos. Maybe dressing in nice clothes brings her some sort of short-term happiness, or maybe she takes pictures because, in her mind, pictures might be all they have someday. Or, maybe anxiety takes over them, and in turn, makes them feel like they need to pick up their house. Behind these pictures might not actually be as perfect and happy as it might appear.
Something we need to remember is to try REALLY HARD to find contentment in what you have, right now. I am super guilty of spending money because I see all of these influencers on Instagram rocking these adorable clothes, and feel like, “Oh yes, that will make me feel happy.” And yes, I might do a little happy dance when I get a package in the mail, but how long does that last? Maybe a day. Or each time I wear it. But it’s ALWAYS short-lived.
I could go so many ways with this concept–and maybe I will in future posts, but for now I want to focus on the “spending” aspect of this cycle.
Budgeting is hard for me–especially when two people are spending the money. I’ve tried so many times and it lasts a month or two at best. So instead of clicking the “checkout” button, maybe I need to simply “check-in” to what I have right in front of me, and just become more mindful instead. Many of these thoughts are things I wanted to start doing for ‘me,’ but my guess is many of us fight these same battles.
So a little food for thought for you (but mostly for me):
Stop comparing yourself to others. We all have different things that bring us joy. But all of us have our own battles we are fighting each day. Try not to find jealousy in what others have and you don’t. We have all heard it before, but the only person you should be comparing yourself to should be the person you were yesterday. Really think about that. Will buying that cute sweater that that “mom-blogger” bought make me a better mom? Probably not… And I am certainly not saying that it is not is okay to splurge on yourself every now and then. Or to buy things that make our lives easier. We ALL deserve that every once in a while, we just need to make sure we aren’t over-doing it.
Instead of dreaming of what you could have, think about the things you do have. Chances are the things you do have, are things you ‘dreamed’ of having at one point. Has it really brought you true happiness? Does it still? What will bring you happiness long term? Try to dream of experiences, rather than things.
Try to put down the technology (even just for a little while). When you are more present with those right in front of you, chances are you are less likely to do mindless scrolling, which leads to less comparison and spending of your hard earned money. I am guilty of “browsing” while feeding the baby…and I usually end up feeling like, “Oh yeah, I definitely need those cute shoes,” when in reality I probably don’t. If I put my phone down, I spend more quality time rocking my sweet babe and remembering these moments before they are over for good, instead of wasting money.
Delete those apps and autosave! You know which ones I am talking about. Zulilly, Jane, Amazon, and Target–(I’m still struggling with these last two). And take that credit card number out of your autosave. I know it’s easy for when you need something quick, but if it isn’t easy, then you really have to commit to thinking about if you truly need it or not. Because, who wants to get up off the couch to get your credit card?! This will be a hard one for me, so I’m with you!
Do you want it, or do you need it? We literally teach this in Kindergarten, but I think sometimes we all forget it. My husband’s cousin, Stephanie and her family did the Spending Strike challange–I’m not sure I am brave enough for it yet, but I found it so interesting, and feel like it might be good for us to try at some point in life when we don’t have a newborn baby in the house. 🙂 Check out Stephanie’s original post on the rules and don’t forget to read the updates on her blog: Been There Baked That. It’s so good! If you try it–I would LOVE to hear how it worked for you!
Try writing down what you are thankful for. Write down the things that made you happy today. I was doing some research on budgeting (for those who cannot budget–like me), and I realized that instead of making a budget, maybe I just needed to be more mindful and thankful for what I already have. While I was researching, I ran into The Contentment Journal by Rachel Cruz which struck me as “exactly what I was looking for.” I just purchased… (yes, I just spent money, as I am talking about how to not spend money!) …but I think this journal will help me really zone in on being content with what I have. The focus is on gratitude, humility, and contentment. I think it will be a good investment for keeping me on track, so I am okay with this thoughtful purchase. My hope is to keep you posted on my 90-day journey with this journal!
Life is just too short to be worried about money, having the cutest clothes, or the best gadgets. Try to find happiness with those around you–family, friends, community, co-workers, and make time for them all. Make the memories. Those will outweigh those tangible things every time, I guarantee it.
Comments